Making Space for Neurodiversity in Weddings | Our Journey as Autistic Wedding Photographers

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Hello! We’re Kimmy and Ant,

better known as The Struths (or Struth Photography, if you’re our accountant). With over 12 years of experience in the wedding industry, we’ve captured countless wedding days—and we’ve learned that we tend to do it a little differently. We’re both autistic, Kimmy also has ADHD, and our two daughters are also autistic. Kimmy also has ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder), which has shaped much of her life since childhood. These experiences have given us a unique perspective not just on life, but on how we approach wedding photography and our mission within the industry.

‘You really don’t feel like you have two photographers getting in the way, but two friends who seem to know exactly what you want.’ – Lauren + Dom

Our Neurodiversity and Our Photography

For us, being autistic isn’t a barrier to great photography; it’s one of our strengths. In fact, we believe our neurodivergence brings something special to our work. Here are a few ways our experience with autism and ADHD helps us excel in wedding photography:

1. Keen Attention to Detail
   We notice the small, meaningful details—the way a hand softly touches a shoulder, the intricate lace on a dress, or a tear that slips by during vows. Capturing these details is second nature to us and helps tell the full, rich story of each wedding day.
2. Hyperfocus in the Moment
   Hyperfocus allows us to dive completely into each moment, capturing it from all the right angles. When we’re behind the camera, we’re able to tune out distractions and get into a flow that captures every look, every laugh, and every bit of joy. It’s like we’re “in the zone” from start to finish.
3. Authenticity Over Posing
   Many clients say they love how comfortable we make them feel in front of the camera. We know what it’s like to feel out of place or overstimulated, so we focus on creating a relaxed, natural environment. Instead of stiff, posed shots, we capture the real, unscripted moments that reflect your true self.
4. Adaptability and Empathy
   Our experiences with neurodivergence have taught us patience, empathy, and flexibility, which extends to how we work with clients. We understand that not everyone fits into a traditional wedding mould and are here to adapt to you, your needs, and your style.

‘Every photo turned out amazing, we are not good at posing for any photos but their warm personalities made us feel completely at ease. We’re so glad we met them.’ – Flora + William

The Power of Intuitive Empathy: Creating Calm in Moments of Stress

One of the unique qualities we bring to our work as wedding photographers is our deep empathy. As people who are neurodivergent, we’re naturally attuned to the emotions of others, and feel those emotions deeply—sometimes even more than others might expect. While this can sometimes be overwhelming, in the context of wedding photography, our over-empathy is one of our true strengths. It helps us to understand and connect with people, especially those who are neurodiverse, anxious, or simply feeling overwhelmed by the big day.

Wedding days are emotional, fast-paced, and often packed with high expectations, which can be stressful for anyone—especially for those who might already be feeling overstimulated or anxious. Our empathy allows us to sense when someone might need a break, a calming presence, or just a bit of reassurance. This isn’t something we have to guess at; it’s something we genuinely feel, and it allows us to be there for our clients and their guests in a way that’s gentle, understanding, and grounded.

For neurodiverse individuals, who may feel particularly sensitive to the pressure and energy of a wedding day, we’re here as a steady, calming presence. We can anticipate when to step back, offer a reassuring smile, or guide a moment in a direction that feels more relaxed. Our goal is to create a space where everyone feels comfortable being themselves, so they can relax and enjoy the day without worrying about fitting into any preconceived “wedding day” mould.

In the end, our empathy not only helps us to capture real, beautiful moments but also brings an added layer of calm to a day that’s so often filled with big emotions. We are here to support you in being your true self, with an understanding heart and a camera ready to capture every honest, joyful moment.

‘Kimmy and Ant arrived perfectly on time and just got stuck in, you wouldn’t even notice them taking photos, they just fit straight in. They weren’t intrusive or demanding, but they got the job done, meaning we didn’t have much time away from the day, exactly what every photographer should be like and exactly what we wanted!’ – Kezia + Chris

The Wedding Industry: Room for Growth in Neurodiversity and Inclusion

The wedding industry can be an overwhelming place for anyone, but for neurodivergent and disabled individuals, it’s often especially challenging. With its focus on tradition, big crowds, sensory-heavy elements, and rigid schedules, there’s a lot that can be hard to navigate for those with autism, ADHD, and other neurodivergent or physical needs.

Many aspects of the typical wedding day—long ceremonies, loud music, harsh lighting, and tight schedules—aren’t always compatible with neurodivergent needs. While there’s been a positive shift toward inclusivity in the industry, neurodiversity is often overlooked in wedding planning. In our business, we’re committed to helping change this by not only being mindful of these needs in our own work but also by encouraging conversations around inclusivity in the wider industry.

‘Kim and Ant were so friendly, chilled and accommodating whilst being super on the ball, organised and professional.’ – Sarah + Garry

Breaking Free from Traditional Expectations: Focus on What Matters to You

One of the best parts of planning your wedding is making it your own, yet traditional expectations can sometimes overshadow this. For neurodiverse couples, there can be added pressure from well-meaning friends and family, or even from the wedding industry itself, to conform to traditions that may not align with your comfort or values. From extended guest lists to elaborate formalities, it’s easy to feel that you’re expected to include people or follow routines that don’t truly resonate.

Our advice? Don’t feel obligated to invite anyone or follow any traditions that don’t add to your joy. Weddings are intimate celebrations of love, and it’s okay to prioritise your well-being. If having a smaller group or skipping certain traditions will make your day feel more relaxed and enjoyable, give yourself the permission to do just that. A smaller guest list can also allow you to focus on connecting with those you truly care about, creating an environment that’s comfortable for you and your partner.

The beauty of breaking free from tradition is that you’ll end up with a wedding that’s a true reflection of you, not just what’s expected.

‘They are such an amazing couple that make you feel so relaxed. In all the chaos they took charge which is what you need. Both Kimmy and Ant shoot so you know that they are getting everything.’ – Steph + Red

Tips for Planning Your Wedding Without Getting Overwhelmed

Wedding planning can feel like a full-time job, and the sheer number of details can easily become overwhelming—especially for those of us who are neurodiverse. With so many decisions to make, it’s important to have strategies to keep things manageable, so here are a few practical tips to help you plan your day without losing your peace of mind:

1. Break It Down into Small Steps
   Big tasks can be daunting, so start by breaking them down into smaller, actionable steps. Rather than “plan the reception,” list specific tasks like “choose the menu,” “pick a music playlist,” or “confirm seating arrangements.” Focus on one small task at a time, and celebrate each little win along the way!
2. Set Boundaries Early
   Decide in advance how involved you want others to be in the planning process. Family and friends may offer advice (or opinions!) out of love, but sometimes it can be too much. Setting gentle but firm boundaries with loved ones about which parts of the wedding are open for discussion can protect you from feeling overwhelmed by unsolicited advice.
3. Prioritise What Matters Most
   It’s easy to get caught up in the “extras” that can pile onto a wedding. Try to focus on three to five things that mean the most to you, whether it’s the venue, photos, or a particular tradition. By prioritising the elements that make your day feel most meaningful, you can confidently simplify or skip details that don’t resonate with you.
4. Create a Sensory-Friendly Game Plan
   If you’re sensitive to certain sensory inputs (like loud noises, bright lights, or crowds), build your day with those preferences in mind. For example, consider using softer lighting or a quieter corner as a chill-out space if things start to feel overwhelming. Little adjustments can make a big difference and help you feel at ease in every part of the day.
5. Schedule Breaks and Time to Recharge
   The wedding day can be long, so plan in moments to step away, relax, or just breathe. Whether it’s a quiet room to retreat to during the reception or a 10-minute breather with your partner between events, these mini-breaks can help you feel grounded and recharged throughout the day.
6. Choose Vendors Who Respect Your Needs
   Working with understanding vendors who truly get your preferences can take a lot of the pressure off. If you’re clear about your needs from the start—like wanting a flexible schedule or a sensory-friendly atmosphere—your team can help you create a day that’s comfortable and enjoyable.
7. Give Yourself Permission to Keep It Simple
   Remember, it’s okay to skip traditions or details that don’t feel right for you. Embrace a “less is more” mindset if it helps reduce stress; a simpler day is often more meaningful because it lets you focus on what really matters.

With a thoughtful approach and strategies to manage overwhelm, wedding planning can be an enjoyable journey that leads you to a day you’ll cherish. Remember, this is your celebration—planning it in a way that feels comfortable to you is the best gift you can give yourself.

‘I cannot recommend Kimmy & Ant enough, their photographs are amazing! They take the most gorgeous candid and posed photographs listening to you and following what you want – it really is your day.’ – Charlotte

Choosing the Right Suppliers: Finding People Who Get You

Selecting the right suppliers can make all the difference when planning a wedding that’s inclusive and respectful of your needs. This is especially important if you’re neurodiverse, as working with understanding and accommodating vendors can take a lot of stress out of the process.

Look for suppliers who are open to learning about neurodiversity or who have experience working with neurodivergent clients. A good way to get a feel for whether a supplier will be a good fit is to have an open conversation about your needs and ask how they’ve worked with clients with unique requirements in the past. Whether it’s a photographer who understands sensory sensitivities, a caterer who can handle specific dietary needs and accommodate people with sensory needs around food such as ARFID, or a planner who respects your preference for a relaxed timeline, the right supplier will make you feel seen and respected.

As photographers, we understand how crucial it is to work with people who truly get you. That’s why we approach each wedding with patience, empathy, and flexibility. We’re here to accommodate your needs, and we believe every supplier you work with should do the same.

Finding suppliers who make you feel comfortable will not only ease the planning process but will also allow you to fully enjoy your wedding day, knowing you’re surrounded by people who support and celebrate you as you are.

‘We love working with the Struths! Kimmy and Ant are always so friendly and supportive on wedding mornings, making our jobs as make-up artists and hair stylists easier! If we were to tie the knot again- they’d be top of our list as photographers to book!’ – Sian, Owner of So Coco Rouge

Making Your Wedding Neurodiverse-Friendly: Tips for an Inclusive Celebration

If you or your loved ones are neurodiverse, here are some ways to make your wedding more inclusive and welcoming for everyone. These ideas don’t just benefit neurodivergent guests—they can create a warm, accessible environment that everyone will appreciate.

1. Create a Flexible Schedule with Room for Breaks
   Consider a timeline that allows for breaks and flexibility. It’s easy for both the couple and guests to feel overstimulated, especially during long or crowded events. Giving everyone the option to step away from the excitement to take a breather can make the whole experience smoother and more enjoyable.
2. Sensory-Friendly Spaces
   Set aside a quiet space where guests can go if they need a break from noise, lights, or crowds. A cost area with softer lighting and comfortable seating can be a haven for guests who may feel overwhelmed. Even a small, tucked-away spot can make a huge difference.
3. Visual Cues and Clear Communication
   Clear schedules and visual aids can help make the day go smoothly for neurodiverse guests. Consider using easy-to-read signage or a wedding “map” to guide guests around the venue. These small touches can help everyone feel included and at ease.
4. Mindful Music Choices
   Music is a huge part of the wedding atmosphere, but it can be overwhelming. Choosing softer, gentler music at certain points or adjusting the volume as the day progresses can create a balanced soundscape that doesn’t overstimulate guests.
5. Photography That Feels Natural
   Many neurodiverse people find posing uncomfortable, so working with photographers who understand this can help make picture-taking more relaxed and fun. We avoid rigid posing and instead capture authentic moments as they unfold. This lets everyone be themselves, making for memories that feel real and special.

‘We could not have chosen photographers that better fitted with the vibe of our day or with ourselves. Neither me or my husband are comfortable having our pictures taken but The Struths put us instantly at ease – something you can see for yourself in the beautiful images they captured.’ – Amy + Mark

Our Commitment to Inclusivity

We want to make sure everyone feels like they belong in their own wedding story. We believe in creating a welcoming, inclusive experience that respects each person’s needs, whether they’re neurotypical, neurodivergent, or have other accessibility needs. Weddings should reflect the unique qualities of every couple, and we’re here to capture that in a way that’s comfortable, supportive, and genuine.

If you’re looking for photographers who truly understand neurodiversity, who are passionate about creating an inclusive experience, and who are dedicated to capturing authentic, unposed moments, we’d love to be a part of your journey.

Let’s make some unforgettable memories together in a way that celebrates you.

‘They made our day so unbelievably special and I can’t imagine how the day would have gone without them…They give you so much more than just photography – you really feel like they are experts in weddings and the running of the day. Kim literally helped me get into my dress twice during the day!!! Thank you so much for everything you did to make our day so perfect, we couldn’t have hired better people for the job.’ – Kat + Matt

Ready to Plan Your Neurodiverse-Friendly Wedding?

We’d be thrilled to chat with you about how we can make your wedding photography as seamless and special as possible. Reach out anytime, and let’s start planning a day that reflects the real, wonderful you!